June 22, 2006

If you are already or about to be a parent…

Posted in The Loving Tree at 1:24 am by joeychan

I made a post on The Loving Tree’s forum today as a tip for modern parents. I would like to share it with my friends here, too, especially for those who are already or about to be a parent:

 

A lot of families especially those of young parents, have both father and mother working full-time during the day. Their children are then being taken care of by other adults, e.g. domestic helpers and grandparents, for most of the time. The Loving Tree does not oppose this idea but parents should make sure that every adult who takes part in taking care of the children uses the same set of rules of the same standard and with the same bottom-line. Failing to do so presents children a confusion in rules which leads to confusion in concepts of living values and priorities.  They will eventually learn to act or even lie in front of different members to get what they want.

And what is it about bottom-line?  Decide on a bottomline for your child’s behavior at home and be very firm with it. It does not mean to be strict to the child because the child is allowed all the freedom within the bottom-line. But once the child has gone beyond it, you must deliver a very clear message to halt the behavior by means of facial expressions, tones of voice, gestures, etc. Over time, your child will realize the existence of this bottom-line and, thus, be able to live and learn within with security and confidence. You can explain to your child at the right times about why you have set your rules but you should NEVER give in your bottom-line for any external factors, e.g. continuous whining from your child or your own temper brought about by other issues. Failing to do so will cause your child to whine until they get what they want which will eventually become a stubbornness in the character.

 

Above is the fundamental and the most imoprtant step of early-childhood education.  Education does not involve only learning from books and memorizing information. What a person receives from the environment in the early years go into the person’s right brain, and helps build the subconcious, confidence, security and other abstract yet crucial factors of the person’s chracter and attitude, which is what’s all that’s behind living and learning. The Loving Tree will keep you posted on the key to quality children’s education every step along the way.